I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
This baby is an asshole
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
Randomize