Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
Just yelled out loud for someone to buy me a drink, 30 seconds later random guy on grindr asks what I'm drinking.
There's a 98% chance your drink will taste like rohypnol
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
Randomize
