SEEEEXXX PLEASE
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Of course I have a pirate flag
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
Randomize
