Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize
