she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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