Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Randomize
