Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
Randomize
