There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Randomize
