so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
Randomize