ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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