sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
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