Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
Randomize
