wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
Randomize