I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
Randomize
