Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
it hurts more in the daytime
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
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