i can't believe i had my finger in that
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
you didnt know i had herpes?
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
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