brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
According to Joseph, last night I crawled into bed and told him to pretend I'm his French maid, and then started speaking with a German accent, and referring to his manbits as "ze greatest Weiner schnitzel I'd ever seen". Basically, last night was a roaring success.
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