Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Congratulations! We have a period
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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