how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
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