I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
Randomize
