Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
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