i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
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