no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
I just typed "I've got a friend" and my phone autocompletes to "that's a dick appointment". What is my life.
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
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