why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
my shit smells like andre
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
Randomize
