they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
Randomize
