Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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