Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize
