i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
Randomize
