So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
