Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
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