the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
Randomize
