What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
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