If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
Randomize
