Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
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