so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
My dermatologist just asked me, "what happened here?" referring to the bruising on my nipples. I told her I walked into a door. Thanks for that awkward moment.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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