fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
Randomize
