Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
So apparently the bar gave out free condoms, which I now have a pocket full of. Why is drunk me shoving the fact that I'm single and not getting laid in sober me's face...
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
