Those balls look pretty dangerous.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Randomize