Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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