remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
Fuck. I did it again. I plugged in my toaster and walked away thinking it needed to preheat. I am dumb.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
Randomize
