I need help removing her.
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Randomize
