he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize