I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
Randomize