$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
Opened my wallet to find a slice of ham with a phone number written on it in sharpie.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Randomize
