I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize