I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
Just want the two of you to know, I went to a golf tournament today. Respectable, expensive… Flipped the golf cart. Seriously, I'm 40. What the fuck?
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
Randomize