So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
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