and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
Randomize