SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
Randomize
