i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
Randomize
